Help! I’m Kinky and I’m Broke!

The U.S. kink community, like the rest of the United States, is experiencing a growing divide between the “haves” and “have-nots.” As kink becomes more visible and BDSM clubs make it on to more American’s sexual bucket list, entrepreneurs have seen the possibility to make tons of money.

If you peruse the web to get some general costs for kinky gear, there is (of course) a huge split. Toys, fetish wear, and various furniture for kink play can run into the thousands in a very short period of time. Dungeon fees add up quickly. And then there is all the grooming that can come with being kinky.

Most of us don’t have $500 a month floating around to spend on toys, outfits, conference fees, travel, dungeon fees and coffees at munches. So, what is a broke girl who just wants to get get tied up, spanked and choked a little on Wednesday nights to do? [Avoiding obvious sex work joke here.]

Yes, you can get that 12″ “cat-o-nine tails” made of “man-made material” on Amazon for $12.99. However it will have no weight behind it and if you manage to figure out how throw it, I will put $12.99 not all tails make it through a session. Alternatively you can drop $250 on a decent leather flogger at a conference or a reputable dealer.

The real solution is to get creative with your kink. Necessity is the mother of invention. When you necessarily want to get hot, dirty, and rough, you can get inspired!

Pervertibles- Or, How I Wreck Michael’s Arts and Crafts

Can’t afford the super expensive toys you want? Make ’em.

To be successful at crating your own pervertibles all you need is a little time on Google, YouTube and a small amount of cash. There are a ton of great instruction videos on YouTube about crafting adult novelties. Spend some time going down that rabbit hole when it comes to the toys you want to make. Generally, I find watching several videos on the same project gives me a better idea on what I need to do rather than just recreating what one person made.

Next, you need to know where to get your supplies.

Michael’s Arts and Crafts, Home Depot, and Marine Outfitters have been critical for me when it comes to creating pervertibles.

Home Depot (affectionately referred to as Dom Depot in the kink world) has ropes, chains, tie-downs (usually all in the same aisle and labels such) as well as caribeaners, PVC pipe, ball bearings and more useful things for creating your home play space. While their synthetic ropes may not be as sexy, offered in as many colors, or feel quite as intimate as silk or hand-tied hemp rope, it will work for many scenes.

Michael’s Arts and Crafts offers an assortment of things to spice up your love life.

  • In the framing section, they have a large selection of dowels. The larger diameter ones plus a couple of eye bolts and paint make excellent spreader bars for way less than anything you can buy online.
  • Their candle making section offers the staples needed for wax play.
  • A stitching wheel sewing tool makes an okay substitute for a Wharton Wheel.
  • Body paint is usually in the kids toy section.
  • The selection of tiny clothespins offers amazing options for torture at just $5.99.
  • There is an entire section dedicated to making masks and costumes.
  • The floral section has an excellent selection of bamboo and other materials which make effective canes and switches.
  • Coloring books, bubble wands, and play dough are great for littles.

Marine Outfitters offers solid rings which are great for suspension at a fraction of the cost of the rings made specifically for bondage aficionados.

The Dollar Store

Oh, the Dollar Store! I both love and hate Dollar Stores. They smell of a combination of Fabuloso, decaying plastic, and dirt. Their food section just makes me sad. But- they can be awesome for pervertibles.

  • The kitchenwares section offers wooden spoons, pasta measurers, spatulas and more which all make excellent implements for impact play.
  • Plastic tarps can be useful during water sports or wax play scenes.
  • It is the only place which consistently carries White Rain hair mousse for fire play.
  • Tons of toy tiaras, boas, wands, and other good stuff for littles.
  • I have used ice tubs, funnels, flexible tubing and more for water sports scenes (for a $1 you can really just use it once and throw it away)
  • Ethernet cords can be braided into rather brutal impact play implements.
  • The “Jesus candles” are generally great for wax play.

Safety First

The caveat with all of these pervertibles is to do your research and think about safety. When you are using materials not designed for sex play, you need to make sure they are safe. For example, if you are fashioning a 2″ diameter dowel into a spreader bar, you are going to want to sand it well and varish or paint it before using so nobody gets a splinter. You will want to pre-drill the holes for the eye bolts to make sure you don’t split the dowel. You want to finish it with a product that allows for frequent cleaning and won’t react to a disinfectant like dish soap or Lysol.

I also strongly advise against using pervertibles internally. Dildos, butt plugs and other items designed to go inside of people are ideally designed so that nothing leaches out of the toy and into you. You also don’t want something that could accidentally break or chip while inside someone. Stick to a trusted sex toy retailer for anything insertable.

Events

Conferences, classes, and even munches can add up fast! So, how do you get around that?

Volunteer

Most conferences need volunteers to help out during the event. Generally, if you sign up for a number of volunteer hours you can get in for free or at a reduced cost. The other benefit is, you get to work with people in the community and get to know them!

Dungeons and other play spaces often need monitors and people to man the door. Take their training to be a dungeon monitor (you will learn good stuff here), volunteer your time, and most places will waive the membership fee or a party fee.

Buy Early

For larger parties and most conferences, there is an early bird special. If you can plan for it, buy your tickets as soon as they go on sale. Many times you can save upward of 50 percent on the fee compared to buying the week of the event.

Tap Into the Community

Traveling to Denver for Thunder in the Mountains or Tuscon for Southwest Leather? Lots of the big events offer discussions on Fetlife for people looking to split a hotel room, rent out their extra bedroom in a kink-friendly household, or split travel costs. Make a friend and reduce your expenses at the same time!

Demo Bottom

For presenters traveling, they often need to find a demo bottom for a class. This generally comes with a free pass to the class or event. If you have experience bottoming, check the treads for classes and events on Fetlife to see if someone is requesting a demo bottom. and reach out!

Bottom line is, you have to get creative and be willing to put in a bit of work if you want your kink on the cheap side. For me, if the choice is taking a few hours to make a toy or vanilla sex, I am watching videos and then heading to Michael’s.

#kink #bdsm #broke #budget #cheap #dungeon #adulttoys #whips #pervertibles

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